Therapy

So tired of going through the same old motions over and over again. All I want, all I've ever wanted, was someone who was going to be there for me. Someone who was really going to care about me. Someone that was going to make me feel important. Someone that was going to make me feel special. Someone who actually wanted to spend time with me. I just want to NOT feel alone. To have someone who is going to hold my hand when I need them to. Comfort me when I feel down. Is it really that hard to be considerate. To think about how what you do might effect someone else? Or is it just me? Am I just too nice? I always consider everyone else's feelings. I'm not saying I always go out of my way to make sure everyone else is happy because that would be impossible. But I at least think about stuff before I do it. I don't just jump into something and do whatever I want knowingly crushing everyone else's feelings. I DON'T just do something that I know is going to upset someone and then shrug my shoulders and say oh well. But maybe that's my downfall. 
So furious right now. Maybe later on something will change the bull that's raging inside me right now into a tiny purring kitten. Maybe later on I'll think to myself that I shouldn't have said so much. I should have just kept it all to myself like I usually do. but I don't regret any of this. I needed to vent, but since I don't really express all my problems and inner most thoughts to anyone this is my only way to vent. So if you don't like it, it's time for me to shrug my shoulders and say oh well.


Katy Perry - Wide Awake

Wow I feel so much better now.